I don’t think I’m either asexual, bisexual, or pan-homosexual, nor heterosexual or homosexual. I don’t understand what types of sexual.
Once a friend asked me:
This problem has been bothering me for many years.
First of all, I’m a man. I don’t have any feeling of “love” for anybody, but I will have the feeling of liking (not limited to men and women). The reason why I like without love is that although I want to have deep friendship with the people I like, I don’t want to tie up with he or she. That is to say, I want to be able to communicate freely and unrestricted, and not confined to one-to-one. I mean, both sides don’t restrict each other. I also don’t care if the other person is interacting with other people at the same time.
Sexually, I don’t care about men and women, and I don’t have much interest in having relationships with others. I’m not very interested in having a boyfriend or girlfriend.
I don’t think I’m either asexual, bisexual, or pan-homosexual, nor heterosexual or homosexual. I don’t understand what types of sexual.
I don’t fantasize about having sex with anyone. It’s just fantasy itself. I don’t know what I’m talking about. As for the object of my transient joy, there are also men and women.
According to what he said,I think it’s bisexual who wants an open relationship. After a clear definition, I will talk about this issue from two aspects: the development of sexual orientation, and the relationship that the questioner expects, that is, the open relationship.
Definition and Development of Sexual Orientation
Let’s start by talking about sexual orientation.“Neither men nor women matters.”It fits the definition of bisexuality.“It’s not just love / desire for a single sex.”Have you ever tried to have sexual contact with men and women?If you are happy and excited in relationships with different genders, I think it can be defined as real bisexual.
Open Relations
The question says, “I want to be able to communicate freely without restrictions, and not just one-to-one.” So I think you should be looking forward to the so-called “open relationship”.
“Open-ended relationship” is a kind of intimate relationship. Both parties (or multiple parties) have the will to maintain partnership without being restricted by traditional monogamy. The specific situation of each open-ended relationship is quite different. The real state and mode of the relationship are entirely determined by the participants.
If you consider entering an open relationship, the first thing to think about is, is an open relationship suitable for you?
Try to think:
What is your belief in a single partner? Do you believe that people can fall in love with more than one person at the same time? What is the relationship between sex and love for you? Imagine your partner having sex with someone else. How do you feel? Imagine your partner building relationships with others. What’s your biggest fear? Do you have time to cultivate intimacy for more than a period of time?
When you think about the above problems, you will inevitably have some different feelings from the past. How do you deal with these feelings?
Are you a jealous person? How do you deal with strong emotions? How do you usually handle conflicts in relationships?
If an open relationship is to succeed, partners must be open, frank and consistent with each other. An open relationship can not be an excuse for cheating. If all the above problems can be dealt with calmly and thoughtfully for you, I think maybe a big problem will become whether there is a way to get in touch with people who are willing to accept an open relationship.
Of course, this is not to encourage people to abandon a single partnership to enter an open relationship. Human desires are very complex. We should pay attention to the different needs of each person, give people the opportunity to explore various options for themselves, and find the most suitable and comfortable way to exist.
About “Like” and “Love”
In the part of communication, you say that the key difference between liking and not love is “binding”. The feeling and definition of liking and love are subjective and personal.
So I want to ask you, if you don’t have the feeling of “love” as you define it, is it bothering you? If you are comfortable and comfortable about it, I think whether you like it or love it, just be happy and comfortable.
I want you to think about it: Apart from knowing your sexual orientation, what are your “troubles”? How does knowing about sexual orientation affect you?
I see that you seem to be trying very hard to find a “general” way to define yourself, but there is some resistance to such a definition.In fact, “sex” is a very personal thing. As long as the way you want is the best way (of course, on the premise of not harming others), even if it can not be categorized in a certain type?Instead of comparing with others, it’s important to be aware of your true state and take good care of your needs and feelings.
